An artist cannot fail; it is a success to be one.

I'm still alive!

2010-08-22T23:01:00.000-07:00

I am so sorry I haven't posted in so long. Coming home from France has been...well a bit bizarre. There have been some big changes and really just not too much time for extra things! I have started a new blog (this will still remain my personal blog and I swear I'll catch up on the rest of France soon!) here: aandbcreative.blogspot.com/ for my creative outlet ;) So...lots to decompress and I think I will be up to it soon!

Ah, the joys of travel!

2010-07-19T06:27:00.000-07:00

Our road to Nice and Cinque Terre was a little bumpy at first...but the second honeymoon we ended up getting was more than worth it! The morning we were all packed and ready to leave on our trip (first Barcelona, Spain, then onto Nice, France then lastly Cinque Terre, Italy and back home again) my sweet dear husband offered to get us, and our host, some pain de chocolat and get a little cash for the road. My husband returned, white as a ghost and sweating already at six am. It seems that the bank had thought that our spending overseas seemed a bit unusual and the $300 + we had spent online on train tickets put our account and card on hold. So, when Alex went to get cash at the ATM a notice came up saying that they were "capturing" the card and it would soon be destroyed, it's vital to know that it is impossible to get your train tickets without the card you bought them with. Super. Naturally, the Brantome bank and our bank back home were both closed. When the Brantome bank opened we convinced them to take our card out of the ATM and hold it for us, quite literally, the bank manager was holding it in front of us gesturing with it. I can't tell you how strong the urge was to snatch it from his hands and run for the border...logic outweighed that instinct.

After hours on the phone with U.S. after hours help, to no avail, we decided to drive the hour + to Bordeaux and pray that they would let us board the train that we were just in time to catch.

Of course they wouldn't let us. So, we had lunch and a little tour of Bordeaux to make it slightly less depressing and went back to Brantome to re-group. Alex remembered that if we canceled our train tickets ahead of time they will reimburse you, thankfully we were able to do that for a portion of the money. We decided to leave the next morning, bright and early for Nice and just skip the Barcelona part. We left very, very, very early and were off. After a long, long, long, train ride we arrived to our hotel I had booked online at five am just before leaving, and despite the beginning of the adventure the hotel actually ended up being adorable and gorgeous!

Champs de Elysee, Le Arc de Triumph and me stuffing my face a little...

2010-07-17T02:39:00.001-07:00

I got a bit of a late start to my last day in Paris, but I was still able to squeeze in a few things. You know, like Musee de Orsay, climbing Le Arc de Triumph, walking the Champs de Elysee, getting some treats from Laduree and relaxing in the Jardin de Tuileries. So, not a total waste of a day.

The Musee de Orsay was cool, there were so many different famous paintings and artists that one hears about and it's incredible to actually be able to see them in person. However, it's no Louvre, and the price of admission, plus the headset (twice because of a special exhibition) was more expensive than the Louvre and the fact that you can't take pictures there was a little annoying, but c'est pas grave. The best part about it in my opinion, was the special exhibition they had. It was called "Crime and Punishment" and it featured an actual guillotine that was used, decapitated heads from said guillotine that had been frozen in time with some combination of formaldehyde and a wax-like substance, crime scene photographs, and former torture devices. What, not your cup of tea? Well, it appealed to my morbid self that had one day thought I might be a crime scene profiler (sorry I couldn't take pictures!).

After the Musee de Orsay I decided that having chosen to save the Eiffel Tower for my next trip

I better climb at least one Parisian monument, so Le Arc de Triumph it was! As you can tell from the pictures, it was rather windy up there! It was amazing to see how

elegantly the town had been laid out, you can see nearly all of Paris and how intentional everything was.

When I was done admiring, and resting after the 283 steps up to the top, I headed down the

Champs de Elysee. There are so many beautiful shops and sights, I loved getting inspiration from all of the interesting window displays too! One of my favorite shops was the very famous Laduree. They have gorgeous macaroons and other confectionaries. I bought some macaroons and a cafe flavored eclair. It was INCREDIBLE, and I don't even like eclairs!

Before heading back to the metro and my temporary home, I took a little rest at the Jaridin de

Tuileries to let my intense sugar high burn off a little. There are several large pond/pools where you can sit around and contemplate your life. Quite wonderful and a great end to my first Parisian adventure!

Second window design for Les Bohemians

2010-07-12T08:03:00.001-07:00

The second window I did for Les Bohemians (Kim's boutique) was inspired by the name of the shop and the image that it envokes. The thought was the window would have a free spirited, worldly, gypsy type feel to it. This window was a lot less time consuming than the tissue birds, but it was very rewarding in the fact that it was done with items that we shopped for and assembled on a budget and using items that had came from many different former uses.

Night tour of the Seine

2010-07-12T06:39:00.000-07:00

After Versailles Addy and I went to Notre Dame (not up though), saw Le Arc de Triumph, the Obelisk (big Egyptian pillar, in the square where they used to do the beheadings), the outside of the Louvre (I would actually go a few days later) and even a VideGrenier where I got a cool vintage painting and vintage Paris photo postcard booklet! By the end of this day Addy was perfectly cool, whereas after carrying around a painting (yes, in frame and yes, it was worth it!) and walking all day with little food I was a little exhausted and might have even snapped at a tourist family that were bickering in the street. Maybe.

We ended the day perfectly with a night boat tour of the Seine. It was so beautiful and we went at the perfect time where the sun set and we got to go right up to the Eiffel Tower and get pictures of it all alight. That was probably my second favorite Paris activity, however there are

SO many, and I barely even scratched the

surface that I am already looking forward to the next time I visit (hopefully with Alex next time too) when I can see even more!

Versailles...this photo montage works!

2010-07-12T06:27:00.000-07:00

For some reason last time the Versailles photo montage was the same as the Louvre one, so this one should work and is actually different! (Also, excuse the song, it picked it and I was too annoyed to go through and try to change it, feel free to mute!)

My favorite place in Paris was Versailles. I could live there, and it's so big that I probably could actually hide somewhere and attempt to go unnoticed! Versailles is slightly out of Paris and has the Versailles palace, ponds, acres (or hecters) upon acres of gardens, different amazing buildings and apartments, Marie Antoinette's house, "mini Venice" with running gondolas and all! There is still more than this too. Addy (my friend from back home) and I spent over five hours there and I could have stayed for days to really see it all. In an attemp to be able to narrow down the hundreds (literally) of pictures I took there here is a montage:

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

The Louvre

2010-07-10T03:32:00.001-07:00

The Louvre was incredible. I did however, as always, have a few mishaps getting in. I may have even waited almost an hour for the audio tour headset to be available again then immediately accidentally exit the museum and walk all around the exterior and almost not be allowed to enter again all while wearing platform wedges (they were walking ones! But cobblestone is a little hard on the ankles in those puppies!) and almost burst into tears after walking in an hour long circle only to find myself at the exact same point again! But, maybe that didn't happen... After any little hiccup it was still incredible, I think I was there for six hours or so? By the time I got home (I was staying with close friend's of Kim and Johnelle's in their Paris flat at this point, they were wonderfully welcoming and I hope to host them someday when they visit!) I thought I'd just rest for a minute and ended up passing out for over an hour. I can't wait to go back again! I think I'll just make a little photo collage here because there was such an abundance of amazing sights!

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Versailles...sigh...

2010-07-09T03:10:00.000-07:00

My favorite place in Paris was Versailles. I could live there, and it's so big that I probably could actually hide somewhere and attempt to go unnoticed! Versailles is slightly out of Paris and has the Versailles palace, ponds, acres (or hecters) upon acres of gardens, different amazing buildings and apartments, Marie Antoinette's house, "mini Venice" with running gondolas and all! There is still more than this too. Addy (my friend from back home) and I spent over five hours there and I could have stayed for days to really see it all. In an attemp to be able to narrow down the hundreds (literally) of pictures I took there here is a montage:

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

BBQ and Petanque

2010-07-09T01:51:00.001-07:00

A few days before I left for Paris Kim and I were invited over to some friends of hers for a lovely BBQ. I ate pate for the first time, had some Peche (peach) apertif that I have been craving ever since, sausage, a spicy mustard that I'm going to have to find in the states, and ate so much I was nearly sick and couldn't even eat dinner that night! I honestly had never seen so many courses. (This is their dog "Rock" as in "and Roll", fabulous.)

I also got to play a popular French game called Petanque (I don't know how, nor do I care enough to look up how, but there should be accents on most of these French words. So, sorry.) for the first time. You have

teams and each round the two members of the teams each try to throw metal balls (you each get two) as close as possible to a small wooden ball. Whoever at the end of the game (which seemed to be whenever you felt like stopping) gets the most balls over all the rounds the closest to the small wooden ball wins!

The team with the ten-year-old clinched it at the end and won, he was amazing and for whatever reason he loved to say my name over and over again, but because it's kind-of hard to pronounce for him he kept saying, "Webekah, Wabekah, Webekah!" and whenever anyone else said it he would correct them, "Webekah! Wabekah!" I loved it and I'm already trying to scheme how I can somehow raise our children to have French accents...

I made it! (Paris)

2010-07-08T00:51:00.000-07:00

(Partially written while in Paris three weeks ago)

I was slightly terrified about taking my three trains from my beloved Brantome out to big city Paris! After having a little potty folly (I still think I might have done it wrong! I went to a pay bathroom at the train station and when I went in there was no toilet...just a hole...and a wet metal ring suspended from the wall that you had to lower...it was very weird and I basically just ended up standing. Okay, enough about toilets!) I thought that might be a sign of things to come. However, after Kim so patiently waited for my first train to take off safely, and with me on it, I got to the airport (not the best way to get to Paris, however that was where I was meeting Alex in a week, so had to make sure my departure was from there) bought my RER ticket, met an American who had no idea where to go (I could relate), helped him find the correct RER, then metro train (thank Kim for the fact that she gave me a really good metro map, and it was in French so I looked less like a tourist which got extra points for me!) and the direction of his hostel. I then miraculously was able to find my own flat where I was staying and later on meeting my friend from Oregon.

After I met with my AirBnB host and checked in, I walked up to Sacre Coeur, which was just a few blocks away and explored the Montmartre area a bit and spent some time people watching (which could be done endlessly most anywhere in Paris!) and got my first glimpse of the Eiffel Tower!

My friend arrived that evening and we went to a cute pizza bistro and enjoyed the scenes of joy for the Cup fans who were watching the French play that night. Perfect timing and something not to be missed.

Caves et Musee de Brantome...

2010-07-08T00:49:00.001-07:00

Many apologies for not blogging for so long, but Paris, Nice, Italy and my love were all worth a little more focus. I am back in Brantome and Alex is back in Berkeley now, so I will be a better blogger again. I've got lots of catch up to do, but thankfully I had a few drafts so I won't have to start totally from scratch...

Before I left for Paris, Kim and I took a rainy day as an opportunity to explore the caves and abbey of Brantome that are just down the street from her house. The church that is attached to the abbey is one of old stone with stained glass

windows and benches that have been prayed on for hundreds of years. One of

the most interesting facts about the church is that there is a holy relic with a piece of bone said to be from a child slain by Harrod's hand! The abbey is now used mostly for the city offices. There is also a library, and a belltower that we really wanted to see, but of course they are open every day except for Tuesday!

The caves, like all caves in my opinion, were very interesting. What I feel makes them even more so is the fact that they aren't just caves in some remote location used only for tours. These caves can be seen from most anywhere in Brantome and there are shops, restaurants and even homes that have been built into parts of them.

My favorite part of the day however was not the caves, it was in the art gallery where bizarrely enough there is an animatronic replica of a local artist from the late 1800's I believe. When the "attraction" would buzz on the artist's hand would fly rapidly across the page he's drawing on whilst he whispered in French, "Oui"..."Non"...It was the best kind-of tacky there is! The story behind the artist was that later in his career he began to have an interest in the occult and

participated in seances where he met several spirits who would tell him what to draw when he was in one of his trances. I feel like I could believe it too, the before work of the artist were mostly basic landscapes and scenery whereas the "possesed" ones were these beautiful etheral people, women with yellowish glows and flowers in their hair. They didn't have postcards of those paintings, but I did sneak a picture of the animatronic artist himself! (Sorry it's so dark.)

Wordless Wednesday: Weird stuff I've seen in Europe...

2010-07-07T13:46:00.001-07:00

Sorry, But I'm off to Paris!

2010-06-10T14:39:00.000-07:00

I have a few blog entries to catch up on, but I have to leave to Paris in the morning! So, not sure that I'll be able to blog for the week I'm there, but I will catch up when I get back. AND I'm coming back with my baby! I'm so excited, I miss my love and I can't wait to show him all of the amazing sights, and discover new ones, together!! Woo-hoo! I am so thankful for all that I am able to do right now, and my incredible host Kim, her fantastic daughter Johnelle, and the big guy ;) THANK YOU WORLD FOR THIS!!

Wordless Wednesday: Brantome Cemetery

2010-06-09T13:12:00.001-07:00

ISO "Le Big Mac"

2010-06-05T09:40:00.000-07:00

Today a friend of Kim's was nice enough to offer to take me back to Emmouse (the GW/ Salvation Army type place) to pick up my bag I had forgotten, and it was all still there! Yea!

On the way back he wanted to stop to get some coffee at the French McDonald's. I saw this as my opportunity to confirm whether the ever so famous scene in Pulp Fiction where John Travolta talks about the "little differences" in Europe was true. One of the "little differences" was that they call The Big Mac "Le Big Mac". I didn't see that or a "Royal with Cheese" either. But I did see a "Le Double Cheese" which was still amusing for me.

We took a very scenic route back, on this very hot day, which was beautiful as always. The valley here looks so much the Willamette Valley, of course, until you see that castle (excuse me Chateau) off

in the distance. We stopped by a lake and waded around which was quite lovely as well. I think we'll go again when I get back from Paris (going next weekend) and actually have a bathing suit.

Well, I think I'm going to go on a little bike ride to the cemetery now!

Still on my mind...

2010-06-05T09:38:00.000-07:00

Today when I was at the market I saw a couple (English I believe) that had two boys that appeared to be the result of international adoption (of course you never know, but genetically speaking I really don't know how these two could have biologically produced their beautiful boys but who knows?), I am in another country now though, I shouldn't assume. It's quite possible that they were adopted domestically in their home country, okay I've been diplomatic...moving on. I've been in a small village, and a few others now, and the races don't vary dramatically (granted being in Paris will be quite different!). It's almost like being in Corvallis again where you know (GENERALIZATION, forgive me) if you see people of certain races that they are students, adoptees, or something else exotic and exciting, "hp"?

I felt that my adoption aspirations, which means kids in general for us, had cooled since being on this grand adventure, but seeing that beautiful family as well as having down time that allowed to read a few of my Eithiopian adoption blogs (families being united after long waits, families being made in a court of law "official" and family firsts) just put me right back there. I'm happy to wait and happy to explore and educate myself in the process (which I think is the only intelligent option when having kids in general, not even adopting!) but I can happily say that I can't wait for our lives to be at that point and for us to start the adoption process when we're ready. It's just another grand adventure that awaits.

Wordless Wednesday (a little late): A lunch out in Brantome.

2010-06-04T08:51:00.000-07:00

My first French windows...

2010-06-04T07:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I finished my first window installation at Kim's shop, The Bohemians. When I was researching the windows that I would be doing while I was in France I tried to come up with one window that would be pretty much ready to go right when I got to France. The birds are made out of tissue paper so they packed very well. I used double stick tape, then adhesive spray glue and finally a glue stick to put them all up and here they are!

Market day in the village!

2010-06-04T05:49:00.000-07:00

Today was the market day in Brantome (my "home" village), it's very much like a Farmer's Market in the US but it also has clothes and other wares, every kind of food you could imagine, flowers, sausage, everything! I bought a bag of nectarines and this beautiful little item from the Patisserie or Boulangerie, I always mix them up. One is for pastries and one for bread but this one has both, so it's a patisserie and boulangerie?

After the market I walked over to the riverfront and wrote in my journal for a bit, cheesy I know, but it was quite lovely! I'm finding myself stuck between this thinking of "being in the moment" and "enjoying the moment", just reading and relaxing and taking everything in, and then the feeling

that I should be documenting all of this. Will I forget the weird white, big as my arm, sausage that I saw at the market?

Or the black spandex, liquid leggings I saw on a woman today who was at least 60? I don't want to forget these little details and yet I also don't want to be spending so much time writing, or on the computer that I miss these things in the first place.

When I stopped philosophyzing and headed back to the house Kim and her friend made Brochette (like shish kabobs) and sausage with fresh vegetables and meat from the market over the barbecue. It was amazing, but then again every meal that Kim makes is incredible (I swear she made soup out of a box one night, that was better than I would have done from scratch!) and vastly

improved from what I had been eating for the majority back home. Perhaps if mon amour starts working mornings (fingers crossed!) then I'll start cooking for us all more...that and not working three jobs in one day so I'm actually home at dinner time, that would help as well!

We were invited to a BBQ at a friends house on Monday (when the shop is closed) and we may possibly be going swimming

at a lake too! I can try out my new bathing suit and, sigh, have to confess, my romper *cringes apologetically* for the first time. Very excited!

I have been thinking that I want to start doing a fun French (ugh, not only am I not able to speak French, but I kid you not, I have actually started forgetting English words! And I fear my spelling (which, honestly I just spelled wrong) are suffering greatly as well!) fact each entry! Today: I learned that it is not proper, or thought of as appropriate, for a woman to drink from a bottle in public. Mostly, I was told, this is from the perspective of older people. And a straw is more polite if you were going to a park or something.

Another thing that I found amusing, which is not actually French, was an RV that was driving by (English I presume) that had a bone china teacup and saucer on its little table through the window! Very different from the view I feel you would see inside an RV in the US, but maybe I'm wrong? There are actually a lot of RV's in town now because it's tourist season and they have a campground right next to the park, it's so beautiful! French and English mostly, but German and Dutch commonly as well.

I also got to see the French garbage truck and collectors this morning, cleaner and more attractive than in the US, both the truck and the men...

Et plus...

2010-06-03T10:41:00.000-07:00

I'm going to start doing my posts more frequently because it's already hard to remember what I did five days ago! In my defense I wasn't "back to normal" (whatever that means) with sleep until yesterday I think.

On Saturday I got le grand tour of the house and shop, although to be fair

I don't think it was until last night that I actually saw all of the house, I swear Kim has revealed a new room or wing of the house and shop each day! It's so beautiful here. The house is very long with a cellar and attic as well as full workshop with loft, the boutique, unrenovated wing with extra bathroom, storage, living room and bedroom as well as a garage with loft! There's also a huge garden with well, old

outhouse, outdoor sink where people used to do laundry, an area to dry clothes and lots of flowers.

Last Saturday I mostly caught up (or attempted at least) on my sleep and had the big adventure of walking into town to the atm and boulangerie all by myself!

Sunday was so much fun, we went to the Viet Garnier (which is like a nicer flea market) where I bought some treasures to bring back for Mignonne. We went out to lunch, I had French fries (in France!) and a tartine which is a piece of toast with (what I chose) atrichoke, bell pepper and chicken on it. My host thought it was a little too soy saucy, but I don't think my taste buds had woken up yet either! We finished with ice cream and a nice canoe ride! It had been raining off

and on all day, but we had some nice breaks in the weather.

I started the windows on Monday, slept twelve hours and started to actually feel human again. On Tuesday, I drove to the Super Marche all by myself and it went pretty well, there was a slight misunderstanding when I tried to leave the store with the store's basket, oops! That night we went out to Indian food, it was amazing, and I even ordered dinner almost by myself!

Wednesday we went to this store that is similar to Goodwill or Salvation Army (Emmouse) and I bought Alex a vintage Tin Tin and a few more items for Mignonne. I also accidentally left a

bag there with some other things for Mignonne and some really cute vintage mismatched glasses that I'm praying they won't have re-distributed by the time we can get a hold of them. Oh! We also got the most parfait black vintage vello (bike) there too, we bought another one but someone else accidentally took it (that's still up in the air) and to make it up to us they pulled out this other one they were saving for a sale and gave it to us instead! I love this one so much more and it's just tres parfait for my fantasy French adventure, pictures soon to come!

Today I finished the windows and I'm going to do a seperate post for them. Kim made another amazing feast out of an impressive four

ingredients and I saw one of the largest spiders of my life, some bugs are surprinsingly large here! A bientot!

France at last!

2010-06-03T01:24:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I left a week ago! Excuse the much belated post but apparently not sleeping the week before you leave then not sleeping for another five or so days after that can make you too tired to come up with an amusing blog entry!

Now that I have begun sleeping again I can say that I am here, I am safe, and I am having an amazing time! In my next entries I'll wax poetic about how fantastic France is and how I am already not looking forward to leaving it! For now, I'll just tell all about my journey to get here.

The day before I left for France was wonderful, Alex and I had a great day together and I was able to finally relax. I had made sure that all of my packing was done early so that our last day together would be without stress. I packed Tuesday night then Wednesday we slept in, saw a few movies, had a massage, ate dinner and saw another movie (SATC 2, wasn't terribly impressed with the movie, but the audience was an experience!) came home took a shower and "slept" for two hours before heading to the airport! I did a very good job at holding it together knowing that I wouldn't be seeing Alex for another three weeks after we said goodbye.

The first flight went very well, Alex is having me edit his latest project right now and it helped a lot to have that to focus on while I flew (which, if you've forgotten, I hate more than anything!) I think I may have slept 45mins on that flight. We were on a smaller plane (compared to the giant one I took across the ocean!) so we were closer to the ground which I took as an opportunity to see my country before I left it...I even had my rubber band around my wrist to "snap away" any negative or scary thoughts I had! Every time we had turbulence or started to turn in a scary way I just recalled what my book had said, we were just "finding better wind", "It's a comfort issue, not a safety issue." And, shockingly enough, I was even able to hold it together when the pilot told us that for the next 45 minutes we were not allowed to play our electronics and that the flight attendants would be seated for the rest of the flight because we were going to be "avoiding some weather" read: impending clouds taking up entire sky.

We landed and I was feeling VERY proud of myself but started to get anticipatory anxiety again when thinking about the fact that I had to do it all over again, for an hour longer, in just a few minutes. But, I took my pills, tried to relax and know that we would be taking off again soon (once in the air I'm usually better, it's the gearing up for it that's so hard for me). That is until we were grounded because of a storm for the next two hours. In Newark. You can imagine my joy at having to sit in the ENORMOUS, stuffy plane for two hours while watching lightening flash against the tarmac outside my window, all the while knowing that because we were taking off so much later I was now going to miss my train ride. Awesome.

The actual flight to Paris also went very well, surprisingly good food, more room and thank the Lord I brought my ipod because there weren't really any movies, just previews and horrible in flight "entertainment", and you had to pay $6 for the movies on my first flight! I slept a little, maybe an hour and a half? It was also really fun to wake up every so often, or look out my window thinking it had at least been an hour or more since I last looked and to see nothing but OCEAN every time!

However, I did very well again on the second flight and made it safely to Paris! I did miss my train ride though so I had to wait three hours for the next one and buy another ticket, very annoying. Then, as if I wasn't delirious enough from lack of sleep I somehow had boarded the train and was on my way to Brantome! This is me after no sleep and 20 hours of travel, don't I look happy?! (The glasses hide my very dark circles and the bush deflects from my very greasy hair!)

On the stop before mine I got my luggage down, sat it next to me and got very excited to be done traveling for the day! The conductor called out the station name and I happily gathered my things and walked towards the exit...and then watched in horror as the train pulled away from my station and continued on to its next stop...

Oh! Also, all the people that said "Oh, everyone speaks English!" not around me they didn't! I asked four people, as tears of sleep deprivation and utter confusion, threatened to spill down my cheeks, if anyone spoke English. "Non." was all that I heard, again, and again, and again. So I waited by the door trying to hold it together for the next thirty minutes as the train came to its next stop. When it finally did and the train actually let me escape, I ran to the nearest phone to

call Kim to tell her that I wasn't actually going to be at the train station where she was waiting at but instead at another, more distant station. Sadly, I came to find that not only was I at a strange station, in an unfamiliar country but I also could not use any of the phones because of my American debit card (it's a different slot that accepts their cards) so I found a nice woman holding her phone and asked if she spoke English "a little" she said as I begged to use her phone, to which she responded "Non". Super! Then as tears started to rise again the woman sitting next to her said I could use hers. I called Kim and after accidentally telling her the name of the station was "Exit" in French we figured it out and she drove an extra 45 or so minutes to get me.

The day ended with trois fromage pasta or "heart attack food" as Kim called it and trying desperately not to fall asleep while we drove the nearly two hours back to Brantome. Finally in bed I had a restful hour of sleep before I was awake for the next four! This continued for three days until I slept for twelve hours one night. I guess I was tired after all that!?

Wordless Wednesday: I leave TOMORROW!!!

2010-05-26T01:27:00.000-07:00

My mama's big blue birthday surprise!

2010-05-19T08:44:00.000-07:00

My mom wanted to give me something for my twenty-fifth birthday that I would have forever and be able to use for a long time. She also wanted me to be able to look at it knowing that it was a gift from my mom on my 25th birthday. (Have I mentioned how wonderful she is?!) She did very well.

When we were in Oregon she gave me a hint: "It's a big ticket item, and it's from Macy's" then she got this very confident cocky look in her eyes when she told me that it's something I would always have and how much I would love it. Well, I then took the opportunity to tell her to please not spend her money, I would much prefer something vintage and unique and that I didn't think she could find something like that Macy's (nothing against Macy's, just didn't want her spending a bunch of money on me!) She kept laughing and telling me that she was sure I was going to love it! Then she said that it's comes in either yellow or blue....and then I knew!! I was so excited I couldn't wait to try it out! I had wanted one so badly for our wedding and now I was going to have one! I picked out "Ice Blue" which is very retro inspired and I absaloutely love it (as evident in the pictures!).

I even had a chance to try it out before I left for France too! It was the mushy French macaroons though...so NEXT time it's going to be much better!

Thanks mama, I love it and YOU!

Wordless Wednesday: very delayed birthday teaser!

2010-05-18T21:26:00.000-07:00

Mother's Day Gifts Gone Awry...

2010-05-18T12:55:00.000-07:00

In all of the madness of getting ready for France and working like a crazy person I still wanted to make sure that we really took time to do something special for our grandmothers and mothers to let them know how much they mean to us. I hadn't had much time to craft or design anything lately so I thought this would be the perfect opportunity! I also wanted the gifts to have a fun French theme to them.

I made homemade French Vanilla extract in this adorable little bottle with a cute printable label and all. My second project was going to make French Macaroons in cute little cellophane bags with nice printable labels attached to them.

My vanilla went off without a hitch, my bags and labels for the cookies were adorable! We made the cookies and if you've never cooked French Macaroons they're very delicate and you make the shells of the cookies then fill them with frosting and make them like sandwiches.

They were very fragile and I packed them very gently into the bags and shipped them with the vanilla off to our moms!

Then the phone calls started..."So...I got my Mother's Day package and the vanilla looked great...but, um, what was in the cellophane bag?" These were the guesses we got "Something to make cookies with?", "Play-doh?" and a "What IS this?!"

I guess that they actually ended up looking something more like this:

Oh well...it's the thought that counts right?

"That's why they call me Budget!"...for breastmilk?!

2010-04-28T13:14:00.000-07:00

First off, have I ever explained the, "That's why they call me 'Budget'"? Or being called Budget? If not, that was my trail name on the PCT and one night when Alex and I were talking about my mad budgeting skills he praised me on a particularly good deal I scored and I responded in a game show/ sing-song voice "That's why they call me Budget!" and it stuck.

Now, for my real post: I know I've mentioned Freecycle before (freecycle.org) it's a yahoo group they have in many different cities all around. It's like the free section of craigslist in email form. Anywho, I recieve a bazillion different emails each day with things that people either "Want" or are "Offering". I've found some great finds on there, but the other day I was very surprised to see "Breastmilk" in the "Want" section.

The woman who posted the ad had just adopted a baby (not sure of the age) and wanted her child to have the nutrients of breastmilk. She said that the baby so far had been drinking breast milk that other mothers were donating for him.

I had never heard of such a thing! As I have mentioned before three of my siblings are adopted. My mom tried to breast feed my first sister using a breast pump and herbs to start lactating but she stopped after a while because it wasn't working very well. My other two sisters were bottle fed. My "biological" (really hate using that term, but need to differentiate here) siblings and myself were breast fed. When Alex and I started talking more and more about adopting I brought up breastfeeding our adopted children and asked what his stance was on the topic. He and I both felt that we needed more information but were open to different options.

If you adopt you have several options. You can obviously do formula bottles. You can take herbs or other suppliments to help spur on the lactation, you can use a breast pump to imitate the sucking action of a baby (that will start lactation) or you can use a "lactation aide" (pictured here). A lactation aide like this one has a bottle filled with milk (be it donated breast milk, your own pumped breast milk, or formula) that is hung around your neck in a bottle that has a tube that comes out then wraps around to your breast so that it imitates how it would be if you were breastfeeding. This also can help stimulate lactation.

I have such mixed feelings, and really no opinion seeing as how I've only read online what this is like and never talked to anyone who has done it. Half of my siblings have been breastfed and half have not. How do I decide or be able to tell what differences a lack or abundance of breastmilk has had on them? One thought (yes, it is superficial) that I like about adoption (for myself) as opposed to birth children is avoiding what happens to your body when pregnant. One of the many benifits of adopting is that you don't have, how do I put this delicately, "changes" in your body or breasts. However, I have read that what causes the "changes" in a woman's breasts is actually being pregnant and those hormones that make them become larger, then "deflate" (sorry) after the baby is born. Apparently it is not breastfeeding that causes that. Second "pro" is that breastfeeding is supposed to help in bonding of the mother and child which could to help avoid R.A.D (Reactive attachment dissorder) which can occur in some adopted children, other factors are key in them being candidates for that as well though.

Nutrients, bonding, cost (no need for buying formula or many bottles) are all arguments for breastfeeding your adopted baby. There are other things that come to mind though, if you're adopting internationally you most likely won't be adopting a baby under six months and they will have (most likely) been bottle fed since they're been at the orphanage and can get "nipple confusion" if they change from bottles to breast. They may also be much older, which some adoptive parents still try to breast feed. One woman taught her three year old to breastfeed because she saw how it was helpful to her other five adopted children.

I still stand free of judgement on either stance being as that I just don't know. I've never been someone who really had an opinion or stance one way or the other about breastfeeding in general, and hadn't thought much about it at all because I've always known I would adopt and didn't think of it so much as an option. Seeing the post that the new mom made though made me think about this more and it is obviously one of the many things to consider when thinking of adopting. We have plenty of time to figure this one out, but I wonder, what are your opinions on this somewhat touchy subject?

Wordless Wednesday: yesterday was one month until this: AHHH!

2010-04-28T09:06:00.000-07:00

Passport love

2010-04-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

Oh passport, you are my ticket to freedom and yet another chance for a self-esteem reducing heinous picture! Government issued photos and I have gotten along in the past, but since last year and the DMV's new "Bone Recognition Software" we no longer care for each other.

When Alex and I got married I had a license picture that was cute, I was sixteen and elated to have just passed my drivers test and you can see it in my smile. It wasn't a model worthy pic or anything, but cute none the less. That ID carried me all the way until Alex and I got married and I had to get a new one, I don't know if it was the post-honeymoon glow or what, but I was very, very, very lucky. My picture was beautiful, simple as that. Then, last summer I discovered that sadly my beautiful newlywed license did not renew my license, it had only replaced the one from when I was 16.

That's when I really got humbled (as if the PCT, which we had just come off of, hadn't done that enough!) when the typically "kind" woman at the DMV told me that since I got my last ID they now have "Bone Recognition Software". What is that you may ask? Well, that means you have to be zoomed up on at horrific closeness and then they'll tell you to "look here" which will result in you looking droopy eyed and under the influence of one substance or another and that the scarf that you will have chosen to "brighten your face" will only further the look of your detached head and possibly drunken demeanor. Ugh. I still haven't shown some members of my family, it's that bad.

Also since getting married I now need a new passport because my last name has changed, so yet again I have to go from having a relatively cute passport picture (I was 21 and my grandma was taking me to Mexico, so I was again excited and happy) to...the one I have now. One fabulous feature of today's modern world is that you can now take a passport photo at home, that fits certain restrictions, and use that as your passport picture. Being as how I'm on a time constraint I had to take my picture during the time that I was having an allergic reaction to nail polish (my eyes had bright pink rings around them up to my eyebrows and they were peeling, very attractive) that I apparently had suddenly developed. Miraculously I had come up with a somewhat decent picture.

They rejected it. At this time, I had about five weeks before I left to France and it's supposed to take 4-6 weeks to get your new passport! I had to bite the bullet and go to Wallgreen's asap to have them take a picture that wouldn't get rejected.

I walked into the store looking for their photo department and the little screen I would step in front of for my picture. I couldn't find it so I asked for help and the attendant pulled down a screen that was above the chips and gets a digital camera out to take my picture. She then informs me that she recently had someone come back saying that their photo had been rejected because they were smiling. Okay, no smile. And because their ears weren't showing. WHAT?!

So not only did I not have a chance for a shower that day but I then add on no smiling and making sure my ears are especially visible!

Compared to my license (which, no, I won't post) this looks like a professional photo shoot! But, who cares when the end result is traveling the world! But it could always be worse....

Totally unrelated, here's Alex's passport picture: he was trying to "bulk up" for the trail at the time ;)....

Wordless Wednesday: Still Sick!

2010-04-21T20:18:00.000-07:00

And a Wordless Wednesday..."How Alex treats me"

2010-04-14T08:16:00.001-07:00

Shopping Spree!

2010-04-12T18:10:00.001-07:00

Now, what is better for celebrating a little weight loss, turning the big 2-5 and two months is France? Well, shopping of course! I have not been able to afford, or been particularly motivated to buy, new clothes (well, a lot at one time at least) recently, so it was great to have so many excuses to do so when I was in Oregon (and again, tax free!). I was very happy to find a flattering, yet sexy bathing suit, especially since I just bought the top and already had bottoms to match! Now, the picture really doesn't do it justice, it's really more...

I also got my flight outfit, just need some new

leggings, kind-of a look like this, but with flats instead of flip flops. I got some adorable sandals and a new brazier as well. I had figured that since losing some weight that I would possibly need to be re-sized. You can imagine my astonishment when the woman at Victoria's Secret told me I was two cup sizes bigger than I thought I was. WHAT?! Have any of you ladies been in there lately? I went in there wearing a bra I had bought a few years ago (I clearly needed some new ones!) from them and it sort of fit and then she gives me this huge bra, and it fit perfectly! Now, I know I haven't grown there, or had any plastic surgery without my being aware. So, I'm fairly certain they're vanity sizing their bras now! Alex argues

that it's not really "vanity sizing" as much as ego boosting for the husbands, but still. Anyone think they have a small bra size? Well,

head on over to Victoria's Secret and you'll get quite a surprise!

On top of my fun new wardrobe I also got an early birthday surprise from my mom...I am SO excited for it to get here in a few weeks!! I will do a post with actual pics of me, and it, when it comes!

Rebekah Carey's Food Revolution!

2010-04-11T12:27:00.000-07:00

Well, technically, "Rebekah McNall's Food Revolution", but I just thought Carey fit better for this. I have been somewhat quietly dieting since MLK day (no, it's not significant of anything, it just happened to fall on that Monday, or maybe I was inspired?!). I have been struggling with my weight (ugh, let me just say, I know it sounds vapid and somewhat ridiculous to say "struggle" with being my size, but at 5' 1'' any weight gain really shows!) I guess since I got married. It was when my crazed routine of classes, play rehearsals and work (which kept me in pretty good shape!) all changed to just nannying and the vicious world of pursuing acting in Los Angeles. *Shudders*

Without having people start throwing things at the computer, let me just say briefly that it was very hard in LA and my size was considered "over weight" or too big. It's sick really, totally

unrealistic and just perpetuates the anorexic look we see on TV every night. However, it really took me awhile to get over that and to get motivated again. I really thought that walking

two hundred miles on the PCT would have made me lose a little weight, but no! I didn't lose a single pound whereas all the other people I met were losing it by the baker's dozen! When that didn't work I figured that I just wasn't working out correctly and off setting it with high calorie trail food couldn't have helped.

My next attempt at changing my body was this past Fall when I decided to train for and

compete in an all women's tri-for -fun (not particularly fun, but it is a shorter version of a triathlon). The race would be a half mile swim (had not swam that far since high school), 11 mile bike ride (in the napa mountains!) and ending with a 3 mile run. I trained for six weeks.

I have to say that I was very, very, very discouraged after the race (I actually did quite well and was very proud of myself, but the lack of weight loss was seriously depressing) and continued to be confounded and depressed about my weight and my body and it's apparent inability to change.

One Saturday I got my Glamour magazine in the mail and was reading an article about Katy Perry, when I came across a "Body By Glamour" meal and exercise plan. It looked simple

enough and women were giving their testimonials about how much it had changed them. I lost six pounds in the first week. I couldn't believe it! And I wasn't really exercising either, I'm a

nanny so there is a certain amount of activity that goes into that

and I do go on long walks with the baby, but noting compared to what I had been doing!

I have now lost 15 pounds and hope to lose another four or five, especially since I fear eating as

healthily as I have been may be hard in France so I would like to have that buffer. I also don't need to lose weight now as much as I would like to add more muscle and start working out more when my schedule will allow it! I have learned how to count calories, but really just to actually look at them! I can't believe how many calories I was eating without even knowing it. I honestly ate pretty well before, I just didn't know how to do portion control and didn't know how many calories are snuck into things without you even knowing it. Now, I eat what I always did, just in a smarter way and with a lot more fruits and vegetables! I know I sound like a weight loss commercial, but when this has been something so painful and difficult as it was for me, it just feels so good to know that all that needed to change was FOOD!

Before I got sick...

2010-04-11T11:29:00.000-07:00

I have to say that our trip to Oregon wasn't all bad, I was lucky enough to have a few days of fun with the fam before I got sick. Alex worked for his dad Saturday afternoon so I took my two youngest sisters to Chuck E. Cheese's, they had never been, so that was a fun thing to experience with them. I went thinking (yes, I admit, a little full of myself) that it would be fun to play mommy for a day and that I might even look like the "cool young mom". I forgot where I was. If I had been the mom of my four and five year old siblings, I would have been considered "middle aged" in the demographic I saw there that day.

The fun didn't stop there! Later that night we had a big McNall family

egg coloring party that my sisters had a blast with as well.

They colored an 18 pack all by themselves and at the end of the night my five year old sister, Ava, showed me the technique she had used to color her eggs. It involved holding the egg in the dye with her hand (no need for the little metal dipper!) until it was the perfect color. The end result was beautiful eggs, bright green hands and two days for them to return to normal!

I was also lucky enough to enjoy some fabulous tax free shopping thanks to an early birthday present from my in-laws. I got some great pieces for France that I am feeling very excited about. I think that a little retail shopping is another therapeutic step to my over coming the fear of flying ;)

Visit Home.

2010-04-11T11:07:00.000-07:00

Okay, I don't like to start off a blog entry on a negative note, but this past week Alex and I got to go home to visit our families. My mother warned me that all the kids had been sick with a nasty virus that had been hanging on for weeks, however I thought it ought to be on its way out because it had been so long. The other thing was that this was our one window of time that we could go up to Oregon before I left for France. Meaning, we had to go then, or it would have been seven months until we saw them all again. With young siblings that change so rapidly I couldn't possily be away for over half a year, even if my health was at risk. So, I did my best to stay away from my 12 year old sister, I love her dearly, but she was the only one still sick and the one who had been hit hardest of all. My mom aired out and cleaned the room we were staying in, but it was to no avail.

I got sick after only being there for THREE DAYS! Alex was working for his dad for two days so he was actually staying with them then (thankfully) and has been doing his best to avoid me since so that he doesn't get sick as well. As if a crappy cold wasn't bad enough, I woke up at 3am last night with pink eye. Awesome. So, I called my doctor's office and called the alternative number for urgent attention. Well, I guess what that actually means is that they page her at home. On a Sunday. At 8am. Oops! She is so nice though and I love her even more now (I've only seen her once because we just got insurance and I just picked her from a pic online from our insurance company, thankfully I chose wisely!) because she called in drops for me so that I can stop losing hundreds of dollars due to all of the jobs I've had to cancel! On a positive note, I have been pretty productive and have been able to research and finalize most of my window displays I'll be doing in France as well as researching for a wedding I'm helping with. I've also been practicing my French!

I'm SO BORED! I need to look at this as a great opportunity to relax and get done the things I'm not able to get done when I'm working 5+ jobs!

Wordless Wednesday

2010-03-31T09:26:00.000-07:00

Fear of Flying update.

2010-03-29T20:30:00.000-07:00

Well, I've got "aerophobia", that's what my book calls extreme fear of flying. Yep, that's me! I'm about 80 pages into my book and I'll be honest, I teared up about seven times in the first four pages! I've been doing a lot better now though, just upset stomach when I read it! I've learned some really good tips though, subscribed to the Podcast and found my rubberband (it's to snap "negative thoughts" away while flying...maybe I should try it everyday...).

I had a little relapse today though, I had learned about "vectoring" which is when an airplane basically circles an airport where it's about to land in the event that the airport is full at the moment. I was in my room working on a project for Mosaic, when I hear "The debris field from the crash is so vast that it will take quite a lot of time to get concrete answers. The plane was 'vectoring' at the time of the crash, a common procedure." Well, as you can imagine my stomach dropped through the floor and I hopped out of bed into the living room where my grandma was sitting watching television. Good news: it was not a real crash! She was watching "Breaking Bad" and it had a fake plane crash montage, fun. Nearly threw up, but you know, whatever.

For the most part I'm feeling more at ease about flying, but the one part I just can't seem to get my head around is the fact that I'm going to be on a plane for over THIRTEEN HOURS!! That's just the way there, on the way back it's SEVENTEEN HOURS!!! There literally is nothing I can think of that I would rather do less. I'm thinking positively though, and obviously the fact that I get to land in Paris at the end of all of this is a help. I may have to try Megan Fox's trick...

" I had to come up with a way to deal with it because I didn’t want to have panic attacks every time I get on a plane. I know for a fact it’s not in my destiny to die listening to a BritneySpears album, so I always put that on in my (headphones) when I’m flying because I know it wont crash if I’ve got Britney on.”

The length of flight is now made even more terrifying... I'd have to listen to EVERY ALBUM!

Wordless Wednesday: Alex's new calling?

2010-03-24T08:57:00.001-07:00

Future hangout spot...Barnes & Noble bathroom??

2010-03-20T14:07:00.000-07:00

Alex and I had to run a few errands this morning (i.e. Buy New Moon on Blu-Ray and some other junk) one of them being going to Barnes and Noble. I needed to go to buy "Flying without Fear: Effective Strategies To Get Where You Need To Go" that I had read reviews for online. I looked at all the used bookstores in Berkeley (okay, most of them, there are a TON here!) and unfortunately no one had it (I always try to buy new books as a last resort...I'll do my "green" blog some other time!) so B &N it was. I wanted to read some of the book a bit before committing to the $16.95 + tax price-tag and started getting that old familiar feeling...nausea, dizziness and tightness in my chest. Ah, the joys of panic.

So, I went to the bathroom, while thinking about some of the new tips I'd learned from the book. I start to calm myself and listen to the sounds around me (not what you think!) and I realize that the fan in the bathroom at Barnes and Noble sounds exactly like the background noise of a plane!

Maybe this will become part of overcoming my fear of flying, I can just come in here with my "Flying Without Fear" book and pretend I'm on the plane flying to France!

The flushing may become distracting at times....

Our Saint Patrick's Day. Wordless Wednesday.

2010-03-17T19:28:00.001-07:00

It's Official.....I'm going to France!!

2010-03-15T15:48:00.000-07:00

I cannot believe that this is actually happening, and I've held off talking (or blogging about it) because in our three years (practically!) of marriage I've quickly learned that "plans change". I've decided to blog about it now, because I've actually booked my ticket. However, it will feel much more "real" once I'm on the plane...very, very, very "real".

Have I mentioned that I'm terrified of flying? I would also say that it's less "fear" and more "crippling phobia". This is me in this cute little clip art, except brunette....and not wearing such a "questionable" traveling outfit...

Now, for anyone that doesn't have a "phobia" it may be hard to understand how someone could be afraid of something that's been proven to be safe for so long. However, when you have a phobia you may find yourself looking for children on the plane and thinking, "Okay, they're on the plane, God wouldn't kill them right?!" Or, turning to your mother you're traveling with and asking in a very solemn tone, "Mom, you take Jesus to be your personal savior, right?" Or you might even look at the eager man filming his family loading onto the plane and think that he's quite possibly a terrorist who is making a public record of what's about to happen. Sadly, these are not funny musings I've come up with. I have done every single one of them.

Hopefully I will find some good books or websites that might help me deal with this before I have to go (any tips are welcome too!) but I am at times finding myself feeling calm, which is honestly a nice alternative to the usual nausea and panic. The calm I have is the feeling that I most likely won't die because

A) I'm supposed to go on this trip, seems like it's part of a "plan"

B) I think I'm supposed to be a mom, and I can't die for that to happen!

The reason that this trip is even possible is because the mother of my boss extraordinaire at Mignonne lives in Brantome (France) and has a boutique there and suggested that I may want to design some of her windows this summer. Yes, please!

I will be there for a total of two months and Alex will come for nearly three weeks (that's the longest his work allows him to take off without taking a "leave of absence") in the middle when we will travel together...and do a lot of this:

Day OFF!!

2010-03-07T22:34:00.000-08:00

This past Sunday marked the first complete day off I've had in three weeks! We made sure to make up for lost time!

Alex and I started off the day with brunch at Rudy's Can't Fail in Emeryville, with a great group of friends. If you're local GO HERE! It's A-M-A-Z-I-N-G! I ordered the French Toast Challah bread...oh my gosh! So soft... so flavorful...soooo goood! Alex got the Eggs Blackstone and they were also incredible. Not too heavy on the hollandaise sauce and crunchy bread too. Yum.

Then we all headed over to Golden Gate Fields where Sundays are "dollar days". $1 parking, $1 admission, $1 hotdogs, beer and soda. My kind of event!

Alex and I had never been and it was so much fun! Our friends had to teach us how to use the automated betting machines, and how to bet too actually. There are really complicated terms! We even won a little....a very little. I even wore a floppy hat! I hope we'll return on April 10th, when there will be Dachshund Dog races!

After a few hours in the BEAUTIFUL weather we'd been having lately, Alex had to sadly go to work. I, however, got to go to Mosaic's lecture/gathering called "Among Us". It was all about refugees and how there are so many of them "Among Us". The IRC (International Rescue Committe) were the guests that night, and here is an amazing video I hope you'll check out. If you want a cool way to help you can become a mentor, you will be the first Americans they meet and you'll get to show them all the sights!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcHh7uZ5WSQ

Steals and Deals!

2010-02-26T15:09:00.000-08:00

I have to say that one of the greatest things about living in the bay area are all of the resources. Specifically, all of the amazing deals you can get! I am a huge fan of the "Used Gear Sales" at REI, honestly some of the most incredible savings I've ever found in my life! There are tons of great thrift shops and stores where you can find amazing bargains, but, my favorite insider source? FREECYCLE!! Alex and I recently signed up (it's like Craigslist, but everything, EVERYTHING is FREEEEE!) and we have found a few little things: a squeegie (sp?) for screen printing, an over the visor CD holder for the car and mason jar lids. But, the most amazing finds? A one hundred year old trunk (much like this one pictured here) with local Oakland stickers and tags still attached! Currently in our basement, but someday an awesome coffee table or window seat!

Today, was the coolest find BY far. Two life-sized vintage catalog models printed on masonite (i.e. the stuff clip boards are made of). We have them in our room against the wall by each of our sides of the bed, Alex has the boy by his side and I have the girl by mine! So, so, so cool! We're quickly on our way to having some of the weird kitschy items you always see in the loft or cool apartment from a movie.

Alex got me this large "B" (for Bekah) from a store front (the neon is inside and everything!) that we have on top of our armoire for Valentine's Day. Next stop? A giant trampoline in our loft a la "Big"! ;)

Wordless Wednesday

2010-02-24T09:05:00.000-08:00

Our bucket...er, "bottle" list?

2010-02-16T22:36:00.000-08:00

The more we've been talking about someday being parents, or even sooner homeowners, we've been talking about what we want to do before that time. Here are a few of the top contenders:

*Live in a foreign country for some amount of time

*Traveling to every continent (would be willing to skip Antarctica...)

*Road trip across the US and back.

*A few risque things parents ought not to

do...

*Jello shots? I know, nasty, but I've never done them! Alex says this is something I should have done in college, but I would settle for before 25 (happens in May!) I have a whole different list for that event rife with immature things I most likely should have already done...

*More concerts

*More backpacking (although the 200 miles on the PCT did quench that desire a little...)

*Alex wants skydiving on the list, but I'm terrified about dying when flying regularly, how the heck am I going to feel WHILE JUMPING OUT OF A PLANE?!?!

That's just a start, it's certainly something to think of! I know that there are things we all wish our parents hadn't done while they were parents. This list should lessen that embarrassment/ raise the "cool" quotient someday!

A Penny Saved Is A Penny Earned...or something like that.

2010-02-16T22:29:00.001-08:00

Now that the longest week of our lives (Alex worked 55 hours, I worked nearly 70!) is FINALLY over and I've managed to catch up on some of the sleep I had lost, I can catch up on my blogging!

Alex and I are deep into saving and working as much as we can right now. For most of our marriage it has been only one of us working consistently which has made saving money nearly

impossible. Now, however, Alex and I are both working and with the start of the year we've started keeping records of EVERYTHING that we spend and save into my handy dandy 1960's "Family Financial Record" book (Thank you Goodwill!) We also opened SIX savings accounts so that we can make sure we put away exactly how much we need to into our house, bills, etc. savings accounts. So far it's going very well and it's kind-of scary now that we're saving to see how much we wasted before (again, to be fair we both didn't

have jobs so the word "waste" might be a little harsh!) and also how much progress we're making! So, it makes it feel a little more worth it to change that extra poopy diaper, or stand on the corner for eight hours handing out business cards for someone, or donating blood because it's...

Next stop...adulthood!!

Utter Exhaustion!!

2010-02-11T17:10:00.000-08:00

Not sure if anyone is missing these posts, but I have been! I haven't posted in about a week, naughty me, because this whole week has been preparing for my last window at Mignonne! I wish this were a "Wordless Wednesday" because I am so exhausted that I don't know how good of a post this will be!

I have been going straight from nannying to Mignonne to work on the windows everyday this week and I finally finished them at midnight last night! It was totally worth it though and I feel very proud of my work and myself and how far I've come in the past four months. When I'm feeling more up to it I'll do a comparison of the first and last windows, it's drastic!

Here are the pics of my last window I designed, I wanted them to be very much like candy and Spring and obviously that coincides perfectly with Valentine's Day!

I am cooking up something exciting for where my next windows will be....more to come later ;)

*More pics can be found on my flickr page @: http://www.flickr.com/photos/-rebekah-

Day of Adventure!!

2010-02-05T21:38:00.000-08:00

Yesterday Alex and I had Adventure Day! That means we woke up at a ridiculous hour (5:45am), couldn't go back to sleep, so I told Alex to get his...butt, out of bed. We pulled some clothes on, no showers, make-up...or deodorant and hopped out the door. We got to the Cheeseboard just as they were opening and the crusty cheesy rolls were still warm. (If you live in the bay area this is something you should experience!) We grabbed our rolls and some juice and drove to Old Town Oakland. We randomly found a farmer's market complete with whole dead chickens (heads and all!), sorry I didn't get a picture. We then happened upon a Smart and Final (Costco, without the membership, we had never been), they have tons of restaurant supplies too. I decided I'd like to open a snow cone cart someday...

We decided to keep the adventures going and grabbed a loaf of bread to feed the ducks at Lake Merritt. We saw two pelicans, a bunch of geese and ducks and basically got to experience a scene from Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds! (The photo really doesn't do justice to the sheer volume of birds!) The seagulls nearly attacked me when I threw the first piece of bread into the water, and bonus: they started pooping EVERYWHERE out of excitement! You can imagine my horror (and how quickly I shoved my bag of bread back into my purse) when they

pooped on a poor woman running by me...

Alex was a little creeped out by this duck(?) its face had a weird red skin and it breathed really loudly each time it went to get a bite of bread. This was the only picture I could get of Alex feeding it since he would snap his hand back so quickly!

We went home to grab a quick bite (still no showers) then headed out for a little Virginia Bakery treat and tennis at the

Berkeley Rose garden!

Even though it felt like at least seven pm, it was only three and it was still hours before

Fondue Fred opened for dinner so we decided to stall at buffalo exchange (Alex got a vintage shirt, I got cords).

It was our first time getting Fondue and Fondue Fred's was actually good (despite the terrible yelp reviews!) we got a salad and huge basket of bread with our pot of Asiago Fondue (SOOO good!) and because it was their anniversary

special I got a free glass of wine too!

We wrapped up our lengthy adventure day with a little reading at Borders and a couple red box movies...then fell asleep before eleven...Oh, the life of the adventurous!

Embroidery!!

2010-02-04T08:58:00.001-08:00

I know, it's so exciting that it gets TWO, count them, TWO exclamation points!! Now, this is not your Grandmother's embroidery, this is the embroidery of Jenny Hart of Sublime Stiching! Here is the link to their website http://www.sublimestitching.com they have patterns that iron on to your fabric, how-to's, examples, etc. I got the book Sublime Stitching from my in-laws for Christmas and I LOVE it! I am a huge crafting lady, and I love to try new crafts all the time to see what I excel in (so far just decent at a dozen or so crafts ;) )

The book has hundreds of patterns in it and they're all vintage or kitsch, exactly my style.

I made this hankie for Alex, I got the hankie at The Center for Creative Reuse in Oakland on Telegraph, it's AMAZING! Then I ironed on several different patterns and this is what it looks like:

It was supposed to be for Valentine's Day, but I'm lame and gave it to him about two weeks ago. I'm currently working on a Lucha Libre doily, it may very well be awesome. I also want to do kitchen towels, a tie and an awesome shirt for Alex, but I have to learn some more stitches first!

Meeting.

2010-02-04T08:42:00.000-08:00

Last night's meeting went well. We were by far the youngest and most knowledgeable there. People were actually asking me questions after the meeting! Oh well. There were still a few things that I hadn't really thought of, such as attachments. Now, this is probably one of the most basic things that most people would think of. However, I think that being a nanny and babysitting for over a decade must have given me an inflated sense of ability with kids. I hadn't thought about babies really having that problem, older kids yes, but babies? Then the man running the group (he has adopted two girls from China) told us that his two daughters cried through the night the first several nights they were in China (when you adopt from China it is required that you stay 12 days). We also watched a movie where ALL of the parents said the same thing of their children. But, they also all said how they got over it soon and all fell in love with each other. They had a montage at the end with all of these kids playing with their families while the song, "Somewhere Out There" (you 80's kids may remember it from "An American Tail")...I may have become slightly misty eyed.

Since the meeting I have to say that I have a sense of calm that I think I've been lacking this past month or so. I just felt like I now know that if this is what we want, it's going to happen. And we can do it on our own time. I would love to start the process soon (again, looking at years here), however I also now know that we can start some of the processes soon so that when we do have our house and are ready for the homestudy (for those that don't know, this is four meetings where a social worker comes to your home and interviews you, makes sure the house is safe and talks to you about any problems that may come up) we won't have to start from scratch.

Dreams and diaper bags.

2010-02-02T23:35:00.000-08:00

I'm very excited that Alex and I got to go the our adoption meeting tonight, but part of me just feels that much more saddened because it's just cementing how much I want this. I want to be our family of four with our twins, or young siblings (I have my reasons, and for whatever they are when I picture us as a family it's with two little boys that look just alike. Not sure whether that's God's will or not. We'll see. Very open to girls/ boy and girl, whatever. The picture in my head is two little boys though...) and we just have so long to wait.

So, instead I'll pray that Alex's book

is a smashing success bringing in lots of money that we can use towards the house and adoption and in the meantime I'll keep researching twin carriers (can you IMAGINE using this!?)

The sling option looks MUCH better!

And my favorite diaper bags(It's a Petunia Pickle Bottom Cake bag, vintage inspired. Literally perfect for me...but alack, it's $350 so thankfully I have YEARS to find a great deal on one on craigslist or ebay!) as a welcome distraction...Bargain hunting helps me relax...

Babies. Babies. Babies.

2010-02-02T20:47:00.000-08:00

...Someday! This is Sara, she works for the organization savingmoses.org and her team found these twin girls abandoned in a field outside of Addis when they were just a few weeks old (they're almost one now, healthy and safe in an orphanage).

Anyone who knows me well would laugh, or simply be confused, by the fact that I am feeling the strong desire to be a mother. One day. Not yet. Also, not by birth. I have felt my entire life that I have been called to be the mother of children that I did not give birth to. I have three sisters who are adopted and I literally could not love them more. I do not have the fear, sadly as some people do, that I would not love or accept an adopted child as I would a birth child. To me, I may even love and accept that child more because I know that they have had a harder life in their few short months than any birth child of mine would.

When Alex and I met we discussed children (of course) and we decided together that we wouldn't have children before I was thirty. Well, I'm nearing twenty five and as horrifying as it is, my biological (is that what it's still called when it's ticking to adopt?) clock is ticking!

I am very thankful that I have married a man that fully supports and desires having a family that has adoptive children in it. We're not sure if we'll ever have birth children, it's something that we're allowing to be up in the air. What we do know is that we will adopt and I can't wait! Unfortunately, you have to pass a homestudy before adopting and that isn't happening until we are living on our own again. So, for now that means saving for a down payment, working as much as possible, and trying not to obsess over the fact that we want to adopt twins (most likely from Ethiopia, but who knows what will change in the next few years) internationally and it's going to take years for the whole process.

Oh well, in the meantime I'm researching, learning from friends and family who have adopted, and day after tomorrow Alex and I are going to an international adoption informative meeting in the city! Woo-hoo...

Ch-ch-ch-changes...

2010-02-02T19:54:00.000-08:00

Alex and I have been married for two and a half years. The past two and a half years have been the most unpredictable, often bizarre, and difficult years that I've had since high-school.

The last year has been especially...random I guess would be the most fitting word. In the past year (little over a year) we moved from LA where we were pursuing acting (me) and screenwriting (Alex) and living in an apartment in beautiful Santa Monica to living in my grandma's house in Berkeley, CA. We were both unemployed and no longer "independent" in the whole earning money, paying rent sense.

To collect our thoughts and process the major change we'd just made we spent three weeks in Oregon (where we both grew up) for Christmas. While in Oregon we felt more and more secure in the thought that moving to Berkeley had been the right choice. We loved Berkeley, being with family everyday, the weather (there were actually seasons here) and the people (no one I had yet met owned any kind of Juicy velour suits). The second week we were in Oregon we went to the mountains and on our way back I noticed a sign (literally, the figurative kind will come later) that read "Pacific Crest Trail". I had never heard of the "PCT", Alex enlightened me and it hit me. We. Have. To. Hike. The Pacific Crest Trail!

Flash forward four months later we had earned enough money, trained, packed five months worth of dried food, bought all of our gear and we headed out to hike the 2600 odd miles of the trail. Flash forward another three weeks and we had hiked two-hundred miles and I was done.

It was rather hellish, I was getting debilitating panic attacks and we both felt that we had (thankfully) learned what we needed to while on the trail.

We went back to Oregon, again to recollect ourselves, spent three months there working. Alex pressure washed, I had a brief stint as a tractor driver (I said it was random didn't I?).

We headed back to Berkeley, got more

involved in our community, did our best to find jobs.

Couldn't for about two of the longest months of our lives. We subsisted on anything we could back from the dry goods we had left from the trail and some gluten free flour mixes we had been given as a wedding gift.

Eventually, I was able to patch together enough nanny jobs to be able to add more to our diets than just mashed potatoes and

homemade gluten free bread (however that sounds pretty good right now...) By the grace of God Alex was able to get a job at Trader Joe's (we never thought that him having a master's degree in film would lead him to one day be praising God for this job, but being unemployed for over a year will do that to you!), and actually he really loves it. He wrote a book, it's being reviewed by editors as we speak! I got an internship at a furniture boutique that I love, designing the window displays.

Things have settled somewhat now, and we find ourselves moving toward our next adventures. Home owners and adoptive parents...obsessive thoughts and updates to follow!